The Hardest Part

The most difficult part about being laid off is trying to figure out what to do next. I mean, it's one thing to have an idea of what you want to do but committing to it and making it happen is another thing. Before I was laid off I was doing web development for the company I worked for. I didn't plan on doing that it just fell into my lap. Like other companies in the finance arena everyone had to cut back and we were not immune to the economic domino affect. I was working in the Originations Department of a well known sub-prime auto finance company. I was comfortable, maybe too comfortable so when things started going South and I had to be relocated in order to keep my job I was introduced to the world of Risk Management. I was never one for math but Risk Management encompassed much more than just crunching numbers. It included the IT/Telecom and Systems portions of the company. It was in the Systems area that I seemed to like and learned the most. I liked the challenges and being able to work on new projects that actually had an "END" to them. In my previous position I felt at times I was Bill Murray in "Groundhogs Day".
Sure I thought about about leaving and trying something new at those times. I think most people fantasize about what they would do if "real life" worries weren't a factor, but the truth is overall I really liked where I worked. I had many friends there, at least a month off each year, a NICE annual X-Mas bonus, and I had established myself enough that if I had to leave early on occasion to take care of my son I could without being hassled. That may not be much to most but to me it was enough to keep me there for the past 13-years. All of that being said I'm exited to venture into something new and be forced out of that comfortable shell.  Is it scary? YES! Could I fail? YES! Will it be difficult at times? YES! Do I have everything to lose? YES! but I also have everything to gain including my ultimate happiness.
So, these are my requirements for my next job/career: I have to be challenged at least once/day, I have to learn something new at least once/day, my schedule has to be flexible so that I can be there for my son when he needs me, I have to earn a decent and fair wage, and lastly I have to feel joy and absolutely love what I am doing. I know that these requirements will be met when it's the right time and when HE is ready for me to take it on. I don't write much about my faith but believe me without Christ Jesus in my life I wouldn't be in the emotional state that I'm in right now. It's only because of HIM that I'm able to function each day and not have a complete anxiety attack. I'm not rich. I'm not poor.  Like most everyone else I can't just retire. I do have my moments of depression and worry about what the future holds and at what moment will it all fall apart and be taken away, but then I remember HIS promises to prosper and provide for me and I feel at peace with everything. I believe in miracles and I know HE will complete a miracle in my life. I just keep it all in prayer,  try to be still, and listen for his wisdom and guidance.